When I was asked to staff the Surf DTS my mind instantly flooded with anxious thoughts. Thoughts like “why me?” and “I’m not equipped to be a leader.”  Leadership has always been a weighty word for me, a word where so many names would come to mind, but never my own. Bethany Hamilton, Loren and Darlene Cunningham and Ravi Zacharius. When I think of these individuals, their leadership characteristics are the first things to stand out to me. They all exemplify humility, fear of the Lord, and overall, boldness in their identity in Christ. These were areas in my life I felt I didn’t measure up. I tend to take a bit longer to fully come out of my shell when first meeting people, I felt my prayers didn’t have as much authority, or that my knowledge of the Word wasn’t deep enough.

I was given a week to pray about my decision, pior to being asked to staff the school. I had just finished my SBFM outreach and was home for about 3 months. During those three months at home I had been given many opportunities to implement leadership— opportunities such as teaching Sunday school, helping organize community outreaches, and speaking at my Woman’s class in church. The obedience I had in truly pursuing these opportunities better equipped me for this moment. With much prayer and fasting, I heard the Lord’s voice clearly say “you’ve done well here, you are ready”. I accepted the role to become DTS staff, though still a bit nervous for what now lay ahead of me.

During our staff training the Holy Spirit was so prevalent, constantly being a comfort amidst the fear lingering in my mind. He kept on reminding me “you’re ready.” Once the students started to arrive, I knew I had to rely solely on the Lord for His guidance, for I knew I could not do it on my own.

Throughout lectures, by the Lord’s grace I was able to be vulnerable, humble, and allow the students the same opportunity. There was a constant work being done in my heart throughout it all. These students continually encouraged me and taught me so much. They taught me to be patient with myself, to step into love and compassion, and to really walk out my full identity in Christ. There were so many things I did that I know I never could have done if it weren’t for His persistence and push in my life. He has accomplished a lot through me in these last three months and I am continuously reminded not to dismiss or diminish it whatsoever. Once I started to walk in the humility and confidence He called me to walk in, I realized that I truly did have the traits that the Lord required of me to fulfill the leadership role He was calling me into. All that God requires of leaders is to trust in Him.

The Lord taught me through the process of leading that, firstly, it’s not about my timing, but HIS timing. It’s okay to not have all the answers. The Lord will reveal what needs to be revealed, WHEN it needs to be revealed. What I deem as convenient timing will never be as good as God’s perfect timing. Secondly, in order to be a leader, I need to be ALL of who He has created me to be, not just bits and pieces here and there. I tended to put my sense of self-worth in the opinions of others;  for a long time, insecurity kept me from fully stepping into who God created me to be. But all the moments of speaking in front of the DTS classroom, leading team times, and leading growth groups have showed me how to take my insecurities and lay them at the Father’s feet. To trust Him. To know that the opinion of others truly doesn’t matter. To know that He is more than enough, and that He has deemed me more than enough, too. My heart posture should be to fear the Lord in every aspect of my life, rather than fearing the judgements others.

Leadership in the kingdom of God is as simple as following the example of Jesus and being obedient to whatever He is asking you to do in the moment. Keep your eyes focused solely on loving Him and loving others, and He will do the rest.

  • Hadassah Daigle, YWAM Maui Surf DTS Staff (Winter 2020)

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